You little ripper! Russell Coight's back on our TV screens
"I'LL tell you what, if there's one animal you wouldn't want to meet in a dark alley it's a saltwater croc. Fortunately they don't live in dark alleys, preferring salt water instead."
Gems like this will be back in spades, with the news that Aussie legend Russell Coight's All Aussie Adventures will return to our TV screens in 2017.
Channel 10 has this week confirmed its new year line-up of shows, which also includes a seventh season of popular drama Offspring starring Asher Keddie and Kat Stewart, a new season of The Wrong Girl and a few new additions including Russell Coight's return.
"The beauty of Russell Coight is that it is what it is," Ten's chief content officer Beverley McGarvey said.
"If we do too much to it, we'll be taking away the essence of what made it special in the first place."
Last aired in 2002, the comedy series starring Glenn Robbins (Kath & Kim's Kel Knight, purveyer of fine meats) is making a comeback - much to the delight of loyal fans, whose love of the show hasn't wavered in its 14-year absence.
Memes, YouTube compilations and mash-ups have been doing the rounds on social media for years, with the news no doubt meaning a whole new generation of Aussie kids will benefit from the hilarious sideshow that is Russell Coight.
Despite only lasting two seasons in 2001 and 2002, the spoof Aussie travel show gained somewhat of a cult following, and this year a Change.org petition 'Bring back Russell Coight to Australian TV" attracted 13,311 signatures.
"For 2 wonderful seasons, our televisions were graced with someone who held a true connection to the Australian outback while being able to convey his vast knowledge to the everyday Aussie, a true man from the land.
"This man was Russell Coight," the petition reads.
"We watched as he taught us the importance of gun safety, the best way to arrive at a wedding, and even how to create a dead simple camp chair. His immense wisdom has informed a generation of Australians on the finer workings of life in the outback, however this knowledge is at risk.
"Russell has been absent from our television screens for over a decade, and in that void has fallen lifeless, life-sapping reality TV shows that corrode our minds, while ignoring the beautiful land which Russ so lovingly shared with us.
"The current generation are unaware of the dangers of salt-water crocodiles in dark alleys, or the fact that they can grow up to 20 feet (although most of them only grow 4). These important outback facts are vital to the upbringing of a generation who so desperately need someone to stand up and show them the right way to live.
"Network 10, please bring back this great man and his All Aussie Adventures for another season."
Whether or not it was this petition that sealed Channel 10's decision on the revival is not confirmed, but all we can say is ... "it's time to hit the road".
Other classic lines by Russell Coight...
"General rule of how much water you need in the outback is 3 litres per day, per person, per man, per degree over 25 degrees, per kilometre if on foot, in the winter months divide by 2 plus........another litre."
"Endless plains that stretch as far as the eye can see... And with binoculars, even further."
"I gained most of my vast knowledge of the outback from my father Russell Coight Snr, who taught me everything I know before he died from a combination of a self-inflicted axe wound, sunstroke, and snake-bite."
"He was presented with a difficult decision: push on into the stretching deserts, or return home to his wife."
"The difference between seeing someone and NOT seeing someone in the outback is 110 square kilometres. That's alotta land, and not many people. Depending on where you are within that land.If you're in a town, the numbers go right up."
"Some of the animals are nocturnal, so the best time to see them is at night. Only you can't see them, because it's dark."
"The cattle froze to death, which proved something of a setback - although it did make the muster considerably easier."