Lifestyle

You're embarrassing me

IF you're planning a mother and daughter shopping trip to buy clothes for your 13-year-old daughter I have one just word to say to you - "don't".

Don't do it. Spare yourself the aggravation, frustration and humiliation. Stay at home and order something from a catalogue, preferably something that comes in a bottle.

While I acknowledge my little girl is growing up and can't be expected to go through life in pastel pink Barbie dresses and shiny patent shoes with pretty lace-edged socks forever, I'm also not comfortable with the idea of her parading around in outfits that look like they need to be accessorised with 10 tattoos, a Harley Davidson and a parole officer.

Naturally our disastrous shopping trip had been preceded with the universal call to shop.

It's a call that can be heard echoing over every continent in every language. From the hills of Hollywood to the snowy slopes of Siberia and over the sands of the Sahara it's always the same call - "I've got nothing to wear".

Think about it. You don't honestly think those Bedouin women have been traipsing over the Sahara desert all these years chasing goats, do you? No way. Those ladies got the inside info there was a discount shopping outlet somewhere out there and they're not leaving until they find it.

No one more than me understands that primal consumer urge to shop and to revel in retail.

Give me a flashing red light, a bargain rack and a sale and I'm there. But even my firmly long-held belief of "you can never shop too long or too hard" was shaken after a session at the shops with my youngest last week. It's fair to say the only thing we agreed on was where to park the car.

As we walked into the first shop the first thing my darling child did was hiss, "Don't embarrass me mum". Embarrass? Me? That's rich coming from a child who until the age of four used to pee in her pusher or have a digit stuck up her nose each time we went shopping.

By the third store the tension had kicked up a few notches so, to ease the situation (yes, we had ourselves a "situation" by this stage) I took a deep breath, took a hanger off the rack, held it up near her and said, "This is nice, it would look great on you".

"Mum, you're embarrassing me."

What was she talking about? "Embarrassing" would be me running around swinging my knickers over my head. All I did was make a wardrobe suggestion.

Of course everything the stick thin, mono-syllabic, gum-chewing, green eye-shadow wearing young sales assistant suggested was gospel.

That girl could have held up a garbage bag (at one point I thought she had) and my youngest would have jumped at it.

Just as my little fashionista was about to follow the stick insect to a rack of misshapen, overpriced, under styled tops I reminded her in my own hissy voice that "It's my wallet paying for this so that also buys me the right to make the odd suggestion or comment and I would really appreciate it if you would just try on that dress".

"Well, I'd rather die than wear that dress."

Oh the irony. She had no idea how close she was to getting her wish.

Topics:  family taming, humour, lifestyle, opinion



Gunalda service hub could create up to 50 new jobs

The new United service centre being built just south of Gunalda.

A $10m service centre at Gunalda will boost employment

3 major projects go before Gympie Regional Council

INFRASTRUCTURE: Anglers will not need a boat to reach one of Tin Can Bay's best fishing spots, if councillors succeed in lobbying the state government for its $2 milion cost

Overdue water project, CBD upgrade and a $6 million jetty

Gympie gathers to remember fallen police officers

CARRY THE WEIGHT: Flag bearers Snr Constable Robert Smith, Constable Luis Larrate and Mr Chris Sang recover the flags following the 2016 ceremony.

GYMPIE community comes together to remember fallen friends.

Local Partners

Kim Kardashian West wants restraining order against prankster

She was attacked by Vitalii Sediuk for the second time in two years

Cliff Richard to release 101st album

Sir Cliff Richard's album cover

Sir Cliff Richard is to release his 101st album

Gympie Gig guide for the coming weekend

SOULFUL: Gypsy Hawk will play the Kin Kin Country Life Hotel this Saturday night from 7pm.

Want to know about Gympie's nightlife? Read on!

CMC Rocks faces fan backlash over date change, headliners

The 10th annual CMC Rocks festival will be headlined by The Dixie Chicks.

FANS are not happy about festival being pushed back by two weeks.

Kim Kardashian West attacked by man trying to kiss her bottom

Vitalii Sediuk targeted Gigi Hadid last week

All you need to know about Gympie's Rush Festival

The Rush Festival kicks off this weekend with a Justice Crew concert you can win free tickets to on this website.

Everything you need to know about the Gympie Rush Festival

Gympie Century 21 owner forges his own path

ON THE ROAD TO SUCCESS: Billy Mitchell (right) with Queensland franchise manager at Century 21, Glenn Stanton.

It's been a meteoric rise over the past few years for Billy Mitchell

$40million hotel, shops development project for Mackay

Mt Pleasant hotel and retirement accommodation, proposed at 194-202 Malcomson St.

$40m development to take Mackay to 'the next level'

Huge Gunalda service station set to open by December

NEW STATION: The Gunalda Service Centre, owned by United Petroleum, will include a 350-seat eating area and a truckers lounge.

The massive servo is the biggest United development in Queensland.

Highway upgrade drives momentum in affordable market

Accessibility and affordability are keeping interest high

Property 200m from ocean selling for just over $100K

BEACHCOMBER PARK: Work has started on a new $19.2 million development at Toogoom.

The estate's developer is offering huge discounts for early buyers.

UPDATE: Former rodeo champ's sale rained out, now back on

Larkhill local Ken Consiglio is having an auction of most of the things on his property.

'People kept showing up and we had to turn them away'